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I Still Date My Ex-Girlfriend

I Still Date My Ex-Girlfriend

Call Me Crazy, but She Still Makes My Heart Go Pumpity-Pump

By Bo Sanchez

dating ex-girlfriend

I wrote this article six years ago, on the tenth year of my marriage. At the time, the first eight paragraphs read this way:

After ten years of marriage, I’m still crazy about this woman.

Being with her is my little piece of heaven on earth.

Here’s my proof: So far, I’ve had 508 romantic dates with my wife.

(Yes, my wife. What were you thinking? She’s my ex-girlfriend, right?)

That’s once per week for almost 10 beautiful years.

And I’ve loved every single one of them.

Our date night is sacred.

Unless it’s an invitation from the President of the Republic, I say no to all invitations and meetings. Our marriage is what it is today because of those precious 508 dates.

Call me corny. Call me deluded. Call me in denial.

But I really love being with her.

Now, January 15, 2012 (my deadline for this article), let me re-write those paragraphs:

After 13 years, six months, and two weeks of marriage, I’m still crazy about this woman.

Being with her is my little piece of heaven on earth.

Here’s my proof: So far, I’ve had 690 romantic dates with my wife.

(Yes, my wife. What were you thinking? She’s my ex-girlfriend, right?) That’s once per week for almost 10 beautiful years.

And I’ve loved every single one of them.

Our date night is sacred.

Unless it’s an invitation from the President of the Republic, I say no to all invitations and meetings. Our marriage is what it is today because of those precious 690 dates.

Call me corny. Call me deluded. Call me in denial.

But I really love being with her.

Yup, that’s right. The words are still correct. Only the numbers have changed. Why? Read on…

Did you know my wife has magical powers? When I’m with her, she drains my stress away. When I’m going through a rough time, all I have to do is share my problems with her, and instantly, I feel so much better. With her, I’m at home. And I rest.

I believe couples need to connect with each other in a deep way, or they will drift apart and look for attachments elsewhere.

Aside from our weekly dates, I grab special times I call “spontaneous moments of connection.”

Spontaneous Moments of Connection

One afternoon, I came home ready to dive into my work. The usual stuff I do: articles to write, talks to prepare, meetings to plan…

But when I came home, I saw this lovely woman sitting on the couch all by herself.

I thought to myself, “Work can wait,” and I grabbed this opportunity to sit beside the greatest girl on the galaxy. It wasn’t planned. But we were able to talk and connect with our hearts. Even just for a few minutes.

Life offers us these fantastic times of bonding. I’ve learned not to miss them: Being stuck in traffic with her. Or waiting for the dentist. Or lining up in the grocery. These times don’t have to be boring if you hold hands and talk.

How to Have a Great Marriage

One day, a young husband came up to me and said, “Bo, I wish my marriage will be as great as yours ten years from now…”

I only had one thing to say to him: “Don’t wish. Decide.”

In that one line, I gave my secret to success.

That’s what separates great marriages and not-so-great marriages. That’s what separates successful people from unsuccessful people. Unsuccessful people wish, want, hope, desire for their dreams. That’s not enough.

Successful people decide to make their dreams happen. Period. That means they’ll do whatever it takes.

Nothing will stop them. Failure is not an option.

Let me ask you: Will you do whatever it takes?

For me as a husband, it means…

  • Practicing “mental” monogamy
  • Overlooking her faults
  • Going out of my way to express my love
  • Putting our dates on my top priority
  • Leading my family to God

Just in case you’re in the delusion that I’m a perfect husband, let me make this record straight. I’m far from it. Just ask my wife!

But the important thing is that I’ve decided to become a great husband. And I make that decision every day. (I struggle towards this dream every day!)

I’ve realized that this power of decision works in every other area in life…

How to Be a Success in Anything

I’ve also decided to be a financial success. No ifs, no buts, no excuses. I’ll do everything it takes.

For me, that means sticking to my core gifts, getting wise mentors, reinventing myself, creating a dream team around me, and focusing on loving my customers.

I’ve also decided to be a spiritual person. That means opening myself to God’s love, walking with integrity, and pursuing my ultimate mission of loving others.

I’ve also decided to be a healthy person. That means going to the gym daily, eating veggies and fruits, taking supplements, and living with balance.

Don’t Wish. Decide.

“But Bo, I’ve already decided to be a success! But I guess my decision wasn’t strong enough…”

Then that means you haven’t really decided yet. You’ve just wished. If you remain in the level of wish, nothing happens. You must go to the level of decision.

I’m reminded of this Chinese General who invaded an island. Upon landing on the shore, he asked his soldiers to burn their own boats. Obviously, they were shocked. When asked why would they do this insane act of burning their own boats, he said,“We’ll leave this island either as victors or as dead men. Escape is not an option.”

That’s a decision.

And that’s the kind of decision that will make you succeed in anything.

Happy Love Month!

Source: http://bosanchez.ph/i-still-date-my-ex-girlfriend/

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Author: Illustrado

From the Middle East to the rest of the world, IllustradoLife shares the stories of Filipinos expats from around the world, providing a global venue championing the world class Filipino. IllustradoLife features articles on fashion and beauty, travel, lifestyle, business, events and other topics of interest to the international Filipino community from its mother publication, Illustrado Magazine.

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